Pack it up ...

One of the best things about being a writer covering the "great outdoors" and "lifetime sports" is that I'm constantly learning about new gear and new pursuits. I recently did a fun story on packrafts for Men's Fitness magazine. The published version can be found here. Below is the unabridged version.

Whitewater rafting, solo-style

The packraft is so elegant, so versatile – so damn useful! – it's puzzling that it hasn't taken off sooner. It is, in essence, is a white-water raft built for one. Lightweight, nimble, rugged and portable, the go-anywhere do-everything packraft is "the whitewater equivalent to the mountain bike," says Roman Dial.

"It's so simple, so stable and forgiving," says Dial, a professor at Alaska Pacific University who literally wrote the book on packrafting (see sidebar). "It really put the joy back into boating. There's this big group of people who just want to paddle their own boat, and they want to do something new and fun."

The concept, like so many adventure-related brainstorms, has its roots in the wilds of Alaska. Dial has been packrafting since the early 1980s, when he and his friends ran adventure races between villages. They needed to cross water, but canoes and kayaks were too unwieldy. They first made due with earlier models such as World War II surplus emergency rafts once used by fighter pilots, and then superior but short-lived boats produced by American Safety, which was absorbed by Sherpa Snowshoes. When Sherpa stopped producing their rafts, Dial and his cronies "nursed our Sherpas along for about 10 years."

Then, a decade ago, a college student, Thor Tingey, went for a post-graduate jaunt across the Brooks Range in Alaska. His inferior raft got shredded. Thor's mom, Sheri, a former river runner and gear manufacturer, knew she could build something better. Drawing on the expertise of other rafters, she did, and the modern-day packraft was born. "All these earlier boats were designed to float on a lake, not run a river," said Sheri Tingey. "But if you want to make the backcountry accessible, you've got to be able to run rivers."

Tingey's Alpacka packrafts are now the industry standard. These boats are equally at home on the lake as the river, and can handle whitewater ranging up to Class IV and beyond in the hands of a skilled paddler. They boast dual air chambers encased by a tough-as-nails polyurethane-coated nylon covering, an upturned bow and, for rough water, a spray deck. Best of all, they weigh less than many backpacks. While researching her design, Tingey said paddlers insisted on two things. "Everyone said, 'I don't care what I have to spend, I just don't want to fix another tear.' And they said they didn't mind carrying five pounds, but they didn't want to carry much more than that."

"I absolutely agree with that. I'm the ounce-Nazi here. I keep chopping stuff off," she says. "At the same time, you can't sacrifice the integrity or the sturdiness that you've built in. People are really counting on those boats to get them down the river and get them home."

The result is a hand-made, easy-to-use solo raft that can withstand the rigors of whitewater without creating a burden on your shoulders. "One of these little Alpackas, you can actually fold up, put it into a fanny pack and wear it on your waist," says Dial, who is not affiliated with the company. Even with a paddle, throw rope, wet suit (or dry suit), a personal flotation device and helmet, the total weight penalty is still minimal. "If you're set up to run Class III whitewater, in cold water like Alaska or springtime in New England, all your stuff will weigh between 15 and 20 pounds," says Dial. "That's everything, and it's still less than the lightest inflatable kayak, which goes about 17 pounds."

Though Alpackas are pricey, at a shade under $800 (plus $200 for a spray deck), Tingey says she had no choice if she were to produce a truly lightweight, durable craft. "My goal was to build a $300 packraft, but there was no way," she says. "There's no difference between a $300 boat and a $69.95 Wal-Mart special. When you look at cheap boats, sometimes the fabric tears, but a lot of times the seams just fall apart."

The packraft is as utilitarian as it is convenient, allowing paddlers to get deeper into the woods, while carrying a bevy of gear for extra outdoor pursuits. In the winter, that could be skis, snowshoes, or ice climbing gear. In the summer, think rock climbing, camping, bouldering, mountain biking, even fishing (a favorite is a Japanese method of fly-fishing called "tenkara," which employs a rod but no reel).

"I see packrafting as a wilderness travel opportunity to get me off of my feet," says Ryan Jordan, CEO of Backpacking Light in Montana. "A group of friends and I completed a 100-plus-mile traverse of the Bob Marshall Wilderness this summer by foot and packraft. By the time we are at Mile 50, we'd only walked eight miles – we packrafted the rest – so by the time we started the mountaineering portion of our trek, we were acclimated, fit, and had light packs from the food weight we lost. And, we felt like we were starting the hardest, and remotest, part of the trek on fresh feet."

Though few outfitters offer packraft trips at the moment, these craft are on their radar. "I bet you, within five to 10 years, you'll see more and more trips with one guide, and two or three little ducklings coming along behind them," Dial says "Instead of piling a bunch of people into a big boat who need to go down a Class III or Class IV river to feel some excitement, outfitters can put customers in their own boats, send them down Class II, and they'll be in control of their own boats, and they're going to be having the time of their life, because they're running whitewater on their own."

SIDEBARS

Choice Raft: The Alpacka "Alpaca" – Light, durable, and responsive in turbulent whitewater ($790; four pounds, six ounces; alpackaraft.com).

Choice Paddle: The Sawyer Packraft Paddle – Adjustable, light, reliable, and packable ($270; 29 ounces).

Top Destinations: Remote – The Thorofare River, Bridger-Teton Wilderness, Wyoming. Urban – The Deerfield River, Massachusetts (near the Boston-New York-DC Metropolitan Belt) Fly-fishing – The South Fork Flathead River, Bob Marshall Wilderness, Montana. Rock-climbing – The New River Gorge, West Virginia. Multi-day – The Brooks Range, Alaska.

The Bible: "Packrafting! An Introduction & How-To Guide," by Roman Dial.

Learn more: Bozeman-based Backpacking Light, founded by Ryan Jordan, offers packraft classes for beginning and advanced paddlers alike. The company also sell Dial's book. Further both Jordan and Dial pen extensive blogs on the topic, Simplifatico (ryanjordan.com) and The Roaming Dials (packrafting.blogspot.com), respectively.

FINIS

Dropping the puck at the Frozen Four

Well, the time for talk is over, as the Frozen Four is set to get under way at Ford Field in Detroit. Here is the second of two Boston College previews done for ESPNBoston.com.

BC fine-tunes game during Frozen Four prep week
Against Miami, Eagles can't afford to make mistakes

BOSTON – If nothing else, Boston College has proved to be a remarkably versatile and resilient hockey team during its current run through the postseason. The Eagles put the clamps on an offensively gifted UMass Minutemen team, 5-2, in the second game of their Hockey East quarterfinals, shut out a determined Vermont squad, 3-0, in the Hockey East semifinals, and surrendered a single tally to rugged Alaska in the opening round of the NCAA tournament, winning 3-1.

But book-ending those games were a couple of old-time shoot-'em-up affairs; a 6-5 win over the Minutemen in the opening quarterfinal game at BC, and a 9-7 barn-burner against Yale in the NCAA Northeast Regional final. Toss in a pulsating 7-6 overtime win against Maine in the Hockey East final, and BC followers have to wonder which team is going to show up for the Frozen Four semifinal against No. 1-ranked Miami University RedHawks (29-7-7) on Thursday evening (8:30 p.m. ET start).

Eagles coach Jerry York has insisted he's only interested in the common denominator, which is that BC won all six games. In the playoffs, every team has talented shooters, York said, and goals are going to get scored. As long as the No. 3 Eagles (27-10-3) can notch another victory, York said he doesn't mind how it looks. Still, the last thing the Eagles want is to get into a track meet with their opponents this Thursday.

"We don't want to be playing a shoot-out kind of game" with Miami, said BC assistant coach Greg Brown before the team flew out to Detroit on Tuesday. "Some of the choices we made against Yale were too ambitious. We don't want to go into a prevent defense. We want to stay aggressive. But at the same time we want to make smart choices."

Here's why. If the Eagles make mistakes, the RedHawks have a slew of veteran snipers who can capitalize. They have seven forwards who registered 20 or more points, led by senior Jarod Palmer (18-27-45), and juniors Andy Miele (15-29-44), captain Tommy Wingels (17-25-42), and Carter Camper (15-27-42). Add several big-time defensemen with offensive pop – notably Chris Wideman (5-17-22), Cameron Shilling (4-15-19) and Joe Hartman (6-8-14) – and Miami, averaging 3.4 goals a game this year, looks like a team more than capable of running up the score.

Further, given coach Enrico Blasi's penchant for juggling his lines, Miami is a very difficult team to scout, and to match up against. Which explains why BC is more concerned about its own game.

"There's no question they're an extremely talented team," said Eagle captain Matt Price of the RedHawks. "We don't expect to go into Miami and play a 9-7 game."

Against Yale in the regional finals, the Eagles "started running around a little bit" after streaking to a 9-4 lead, and got careless, said Price. The Bulldogs took advantage, roaring back with three unanswered goals to cut the BC lead to 9-7 before the clock ran out.

"We got away from some of the fundamentals, some of the core values that made this team successful," said Price. "Taking care of the puck at both blue lines is significant. At this level, if you give a player a half step, he'll do something with it. We have to negate that."

Likewise, BC's associate head coach Mike Cavanaugh said recent practice sessions were used to fine-tune, and not reinvent, the team. "We're going to play the way we always play," he said on Monday. "Whether it's the first game of the year or the semifinals of the national tournament, you have to do what you do well. You can't change your style. We're not going to be a neutral-zone trap team. We're going to play a pretty aggressive style."

Comparing recent high-scoring wins, Cavanaugh said he was more concerned with the lack of discipline that the Eagles showed in the Maine game. "We want to be smarter playing with the lead," he said. "Maine was more disconcerting that Yale, because we allowed them to get back in it."

Four times in the Maine game, the Black Bears struck for a goal less than three minutes after a BC tally, twice within a minute. "We couldn't hold the lead, and that's something we emphasized all year long," said Cavanaugh. "We just didn't execute. That happens."

If the Eagles do get in a hole early on Thursday, digging out could prove a Herculean task. Miami has a young-but-talented defensive group (all freshmen and sophomores), plus a pair of sophomore goaltenders – Cody Reichard and Connor Knapp – who are boasting All-American numbers. Each has a goals against average under 1.90, and a save percentage above .920. As a team, Miami has a 1.84 goals against average. And although the Eagle forwards have shown this post-season that they're a deep group, with a number of role players stepping up to contribute, expect Miami to key on BC's resurgent second line of Cam Atkinson (27-23-50), Brian Gibbons (16-30-46) and Joe Whitney (16-23-39), which exploded out of a mild post-season slump to score six times against Yale.

"I think we have so much depth, it's not going to be one line scoring," said Atkinson. "We have to have everyone contributing. We just have to realize that the offence will come, but defense comes first."

The fact that BC's leading scorer was equally conscientious of his line's defensive responsibilities speaks volumes about the Eagles recommitment to protecting their own net. Senior Carl Sneep, the lone upperclassman on BC's blueline, said the Eagles' defensive corps, while young, is game-ready, thanks to a number of high-profile games this year, including the Frozen Fenway match and Beanpot final (both against Boston University), and the Hockey East and Northeast Regional sweeps.

"I'm just telling them to focus on their game," said Sneep. "It's knowing how to deal with pressure situations, and not let it break your focus. We just have to play our game."

Meanwhile, junior goaltender John Muse (pictured above), already with one national championship on his resume, brings a quiet confidence that Sneep and Price said is the backbone of their squad. The Eagles will need him at his best.

"We really want to try to implement a complete game plan," said Brown. "Defensively you want to make the ice smaller for the other team. On the offensive side, you want to expand it. If you can take away time and space, it's hard for the other team to do what they want to execute their game plan, no matter how good they are."

Both coaches also downplayed any potential motivation that Miami might have facing a Boston team in the NCAAs for the fourth straight year. Blasi's RedHawks dropped the previous three contests, the last two by identical 4-3 overtime scores, first to BC in the 2008 quarterfinals, and then in heartbreaking fashion to BU in last year's championship game.

"They're a different team and we're a different team," said Blasi, referring to the 2007 and 2008 NCAA games between Miami and BC. "As far as a rematch, that's great for media and Hollywood stories. We're focused on what BC is today. I can tell you they're really quick and fast and offensively explosive. We'll have to be at our best to give them a good game.

"This is the Frozen Four," Blasi said. "Both teams have experience in it. So I think you can throw the experience out the window, and it will come down to the two teams playing on the ice."

York echoed similar sentiments. "I think all the teams that make it to the Frozen Four have great motivation," he said. "The prize we seek lives with you for the rest of your life."

FINIS

Eagles set to fly in Detroit

After last Sunday's wild 9-7 win over Yale, the Boston College Eagles found themselves in familiar territory, as one of the last teams standing in college hockey's Frozen Four. Here's the first of two previews written for ESPNBoston.com.

Eagles mix youth and experience

BOSTON -- The enormous, poster-size hockey schedule that adorns the wall outside the Boston College locker room is different than most. Like any schedule, it features opponents, game dates and times and locations. But the games are listed in reverse order, like an inverted pyramid, with the first games of the season listed at the bottom in miniscule print. The date on top, in large, bold print, is April 10, 2010, the NCAA championship game at Ford Field in Detroit.

That maroon-and-gold poster, while simple in design, speaks volumes about how Boston College approaches the season, and epitomizes coach Jerry York's singular focus. York and his Eagles expect to be in the running for a national crown every year, and they make no bones about highlighting that goal. The fact they were daring enough to state it this year, with such a young team gathering at the Heights, is a testament to the team's ironclad resolve.

"We didn't make it last year," BC's senior captain Matt Price, pictured above, said earlier this week. "We want to get back to it."

Two years ago, the Eagles stood on top of the NCAA hill, dispatching the Fighting Irish of Notre Dame in the 2008 finals. But the 2008-09 campaign was a disappointment by BC standards. The team went 18-14-5 overall, but only 11-11-2 in Hockey East. The Eagles came within a whisker of making the Hockey East finals, where a win would have ensured an automatic bid to the NCAAs. But three third-period goals by arch rival and eventual national champs Boston University tripped up the Eagles 3-2, and ended BC's season prematurely.

Even more daunting, York knew he was losing three top-notch senior defensemen in Anthony Aiello, Tim Filangieri and Tim Kunes. When sophomore Nick Petrecki signed a pro contract, and stalwart goaltender John Muse underwent serious hip surgery, York suddenly had a gaping hole in his defense. He looked for defensemen Carl Sneep, a senior, and Tommy Cross, a sophomore, to take on leadership roles. And he called on freshmen Brian Dumoulin, Patch Alber, Patrick Wey and Philip Samuelsson (son of former NHL defenseman Ulf Samuelsson) to play major roles, as well as freshman goaltender Parker Milner to help relieve Muse's workload.

"We're going to break in four first-year players [on defense]," York said last fall. "There will be some growing pains in that process. I'm still optimistic that, as we go deep into our season, this corps will be very solid."

Those players, including Muse, made York look like a prophet. York said his 37 seasons as head coach have taught him to be patient, allowing younger players to develop. Standing next to the oversized schedule this week, he pointed to the early season games, and said those are his team's proving grounds, when it's important to make sure everyone is getting enough ice time.

"In the early part of the season, in October and November, you're not going to shorten your bench," York said. "The idea is to win as many games as you can, but you're trying to give everyone a chance."

Though every game is critical, especially in the pair-wise rankings that are used to determine the teams that make the NCAA tournament, York said it's just as imperative to cultivate talent from top to bottom. York didn't deviate from form, even when the Eagles hit a rough patch right after the Christmas holiday season, losing twice in the Wells Fargo Denver Cup to St. Lawrence and Denver University, and to Boston University 3-2 in the outdoor Frozen Fenway game at Fenway Park.

"That was a low period, but I've always said that's the best time to buy stock in BC hockey, because it'll take off," York said this week. "You're not going to win every game. The trick is to be positive, and weather that storm. We knew we had a good club, and I could see the young kids maturing."

Since the Frozen Fenway game, the Eagles have gone on a 17-4-1 tear (including the NCAA tournament), which bolsters York's reputation as a coach who gets his team playing its best hockey when it counts the most. York's record in March at BC -- 75-25-6 -- bears out his game plan. The senior class of Price, Sneep and alternate captains Ben Smith and Matt Lombardi has gone a remarkable 25-3-2 in March.

"We've had some outstanding seniors with leadership over the years, and this class of seniors rivals any of the classes that I've had," York said. "They are mentors to our younger players."

While the seniors and juniors have led by word and example, the younger players proved to be a quick study. For example, sophomore Cam Atkinson, BC's dynamic right wing, exploded for 27 goals this year after potting seven his freshman campaign.

"Everyone from my class has stepped it up," he said. "Everyone's doing their part."

According to Smith, the Eagles couldn't have run the table in the Hockey East playoffs and Northeast Regionals without major contributions from their underclassmen. "That was one of our biggest questions coming into the year," he said. "We had a lot of freshmen and sophomores, and we were wondering how these two classes would contribute. They see the expectations, and it's great to see Brian Doumulin, Chris Kreider and Phil Samuelsson play so well."

"It has been a huge part of our success to be able to rely on [the underclassmen], especially Chris Kreider down the stretch, and those four freshman defensemen," Smith said. "For those guys, they knew coming in that they would have that chance to gain ice time and to succeed."

"At this stage of the game, it's all about team," Price agreed. "We've built that throughout the year. Right now, we're not seniors, juniors, sophomores or freshmen. We're all Eagles."

Price also acknowledged that the Eagles have benefited from playing in several high-stakes, big-venue games already, including the Frozen Fenway match, the Beanpot and Hockey East finals and the Northeast Regionals. In addition, Kreider played in the World Junior Championships, where his United States squad won the gold medal. Atkinson said those big stages are a major attraction of the BC program.

"That's why people come to BC," he said, "to play in these big games."

The games don't get any bigger than next week, starting with the NCAA semifinals. The third-ranked Eagles (27-10-3) stand a single game away from reaching the championship game. In their way is a worthy opponent, the consensus No. 1 team in the country, the Miami RedHawks (29-9-7). The game is set for April 8 at Detroit's Ford Field, just like it states on BC's schedule.

"We're very excited to be going back to the Frozen Four," York said. "It's the pinnacle for the coaches and players. The only thing that tops it is to win it."

FINIS

The most solitary position in sports ...

Goalie camp? At 43? Why not? Goes to show you're never too old to take a puck upside the head. This account of one of the longest weeks of my life (albeit eight years ago) appeared in the now-defunct Hockey Magazine. The photo at right comes from my once-in-a-lifetime outing last January, playing at Fenway Park in Boston.

Net gain
A 40-something goaltender tries to recapture his long-lost glory days

Lying prone on a cool sheet of ice, gasping for air, I lapse into another Walter Mitty fantasy. I'm no longer at the Mount Vernon Recreation and Ice Center outside Washington, D.C., desperately trying to keep from overheating beneath 35-plus pounds of soaking-wet goaltending gear. No, I'm between the pipes at Madison Square Garden, sporting the home white sweater of my beloved Rangers. The time? Winter, 1974.

Boston Bruins' winger Wayne Cashman is in the corner, mucking it up with Dale Roulfe, my Rock-of-Gibraltar defenseman. The puck squirts to the front of the net. Bruins' center Phil Esposito, on his way to a 68-goal season, pounces on it. He snaps off a lightning quick snap shot, low, stick-side. I instinctively flash my left leg pad. The puck glances off my toe buckle and flips harmlessly into the crowd. In the press box, Marv Albert screams into his microphone, "Kick save, O'Connor, and a beauty!" Color man Bill Chadwick, a Hall of Fame referee, chimes in: "This kid O'Connor came to play tonight ..." A goofy, satisfied grin creases my face.

"O'Connor! Hey, O'Connor! You gonna play sometime today?" barks Gerry "Elroy" Ellison, part-time goalie instructor and full-time drill sergeant. I surface reluctantly from my reverie, blinking the sweat from my eyes, realizing I'm still at the Puckstoppers Goaltending School. Slowly, I pull my bruised body off the ice, and resume my post for the next drill. I want to blame my murky state of mind on taking a puck up side the head, but I can't. I'm hurting because I'm 43. Whatever fitness I brought to camp with me evaporated as quickly as my fantasy. And my instructors aren't cutting me much slack.

At this precise moment, I'm struggling to recall exactly why I signed on for this five-day camp. There are vague recollections - I not only hoped to recapture some of my youth, but I wanted to make sure the guys in the late-night league back home in Boston weren't thinking I'd gotten soft. Several of my goaltending colleagues have been entertaining thoughts about hanging up their pads and skates, which only hardened my resolve to turn back the clock.

Truth is, I never had any formal education in the science of goaltending. My coaches in high school and the early days of college were former position players - forwards and defensemen - who had trouble relating to goalies. As other hockey players will attest, goalies are a singular breed, requiring special tutoring (or, as one derisive teammate once told me, “custom-made strait jackets”).My education was self-imposed - I ceaselessly studied Hall of Famer Jacques Plante's tome, "On Goaltending," until the book’s binder nearly disintegrated, and tried to apply its lessons to my game.

Recently, on the downhill side of my athletic career but still playing a few times each week, my mind shifted into a "now or never" mode. I could soldier on, a half-decent, middle-age goalie, or I could try to pick up my game a notch. What I needed was some top-notch instruction. I found it with Puckstoppers, an Ontario-based outfit that visits Alexandria, Virginia, each summer for a week. You might not think of the District of Columbia and its environs as a hotbed for hockey. Think again.

At the end of every morning session, dozens of pick-up players were lining up for noontime "stick practice." Back home in Massachusetts, many rinks shut down in the summer. Mount Vernon ice director Ernie Harris tells me "This place was originally designed to have two rinks. If I had that second sheet, I could book it solid."

On the first morning of camp, I sat in snarled Beltway traffic, listening with a jaded ear to Bruce Springsteen's "Glory Days" on the radio, wondering whether I still had the goods, and whether I'd be the only gray-haired keeper in the class. Heck, I'd have settle for anyone who could legally join me for a beer afterward.

Fortunately, I met two guys my age - Gerry Oakman, who works with the Justice Department, and Joe O'Connell, a family doctor from Arkansas. Both have Boston-area roots, and share an almost inexplicable love for hockey. We hit it off immediately. In hindsight, that's not surprising.

Goalies are naturally drawn to each other. We’re part of a team, yet stand apart – masked loners, solitary watchmen standing guard by our nets the entire game, an army of one. Other players don’t know what to make of us, but most are convinced that only someone with a few screws loose would actually volunteer to play our position. Buried under layers of unwieldy gear and confined to a limited skating area, goalies stick out like ocean liners surrounded by speedboats. Together, we make up an odd fraternity, a fellowship of proud masochists.

Our task is simple: Stop a vulcanized rubber puck, an inch thick and three inches in diameter, from entering a 4-by-6 foot goal. With composite sticks and curved blades, even recreational players can fire a puck upwards of 100 miles an hour. Adding insult to potential injury, the very nature of the position leads to more criticism than applause. We give up goals, but don't score them. We're often blamed for losses, but only occasionally praised for victories. We are, in short, the team’s lightning rod.

Oakman recalls a Plante quote - "How would you like to have a job, that when you made a mistake, a big red light went on and 18,000 people booed?"

"For me, that's a motivator, to join a very select group of men and women who step up to meet that challenge," says Oakman.

Challenge indeed. I always thrived on goaltending’s unique reality – by the position’s very nature, the goalie is the one player who can single-handedly stop an entire team from winning. After all, if the opponent doesn’t score, you can’t lose. And on those rare games when I’m really focused and feeling invincible, the puck looks the size of a balloon, and moves about as quick. In my mind’s eye, it seems I can see where the puck is going even before the shot is fired. Granted, those moments didn’t come often enough to sustain my dream of a pro career or Division I scholarship. But even now, when they happen, they’re magic.

Unfortunately, I quickly realize there’s nothing “magical” about goalie camp. I understand it’s purpose and promise, but I’m ill prepared for the workload. For the next five days, two hours each morning, two each afternoon, Ellison and his Puckstoppers colleagues run us through a gamut of drills and instruction designed to improve our game. Or kill us.

We work on stance, movement, angles, low shots, high shots, deflections, rebounds, breakaways. Shooting machines fire pucks at us relentlessly - one nicks a crease in my armor, just above my blocker, and my elbow stings for hours. During each session, usually following some tortuous skating or agility drill, Oakman, O'Connell and I exchange futile glances and muted words of encouragement. Sweat pours from old pores as we struggle to keep pace with youngsters a fraction of our age. Each day, we wonder aloud whether we can finish the week. Parents of younger campers look at us as though we've lost our marbles. Incredulous, I reply: "Hey, we're goalies!"

The inference, I trust, is crystal clear - goaltenders, whether young or aging, are by definition a bit off-center. We all survive - barely.

"I'm sure people were giggling behind my back," says O'Connell, who admits hoping to play well into his 60s. "Screw 'em. I always wanted to do this."

Two weeks after I hauled my oversized bag of goalie gear from the Mount Vernon Ice Center for the last time, and the aches have finally subsided, my evaluation from the Puckstoppers gang arrives. I glance at the list of the position's finer points, including everything from dexterity, glove saves and rebounds. Most of my ratings fall in the "fair" category, with some "good" and a few "excellent" marks. Charity points, I figure. Head coach Chris Dyson reminds me, "glove in front, pads a bit apart."

"If you work on those small points, your game will be huge," writes Dyson. "Unfortunately, there were so many 'small things' I can't remember them all!"

Dyson's good-natured jab is followed by a happy-face doodle. I can read between the lines. I'm being told, gently, "Don't quit your day job." Walter Mitty would be crushed. Not me. Come tomorrow night, I'll be down at the rink, facing rubber.

FINIS